sent me shits

why it must be like this ?

why it must be me who always get tortured by their deeds ?

why it must be my heart which break always ?

why You must send them to me if they only bring sadness and aimless to my life ?

why Allah ?

is it that you have plan something for me?

big or small ?

until I still can't get my love .

my kasih sayang that I yearn all this years.

why Allah ?

why I still can't get it ?

is this what You want to see ?

my patience ?

how many years more ? 

how many days more ?

Allah . 

Pardon me . 

pardon me . 

I know I'm the one who can't always optimist with your fate

I know I'm always wrong

Until they left me

all that I love

they left me alone here Ya Allah

should I never put on hope to any man afterwards ?

But i need love Ya Allah .

I need love .

It never enough love from a family .

I want love from them , who had left me .

the one that You sent to me

the one that You ask to torture me .

Ya Allah . 

give me the strength .

It has been always like this . 

WHY ?

satu lagi sejarah terukir

this is my life. to be love and to be lost . ;) selamat tinggal cinta. kau memang hipokrit . takkan aku percaya lagi lelaki sepertimu. pergilah jauh2 dari hidupku . 

best of me ?

It's so hard to say that I'm sorry
I'll make everything alright
All these things that I've done
What have I become, and where'd I go wrong?
I don't mean to hurt just to put you first
I won't tell you lies
I will stand accused
With my hand on my heart
I'm just trying to say

I'm sorry
It's all that I can say
You mean so much
And I'd fix all that I've done
If I could start again
I'd throw it all away
To the shadows of regrets
And you would have the best of me

I know that I can't take back all of the mistakes
But I will try
Although it's not easy
I know you believe me
Cause I would not lie
Don't believe their lies
Told from jealous eyes
They don't understand
I won't break your heart
I won't bring you down
But I will have to say

I'm sorry
It's all that I can say
You mean so much
And I'd fix all that I've done
If I could start again
I'd throw it all away
To the shadows of regrets
And you would have the best of me

I'm sorry
It's all that I can say
You mean so much
And I'd fix all that I've done
If I could start again
I'd throw it all away
To the shadows of regrets
And you would have the best of me

Penebus cintaku

ok off song . horhor ( minat je aku ayat tu skrg ) hehe . rite . mp3 dh off. sekarang nk meluahkan perasaan. yalah. ni aku terasa nk buat puisi ni. ohohh . terimalah . puisi live dpd sy *hehe* ;

       langit berbaris-baris jingga

angin berderu lagi buat kesekian kali

dedaunan mula mengawal tari 

bunga-bungaan gugur dan bertaburan di tanah 

aku sunyi. 

sungguh .

aku sunyi. 

bias-bias suara dari jalan kedengaran

mungkin semuanya sedang sibuk menguruskan hal duniawi mereka

meninggalkan aku seorang di malam ini.

titis-titis hujan mula menurun . 

hanya sebentar mungkin menjenguk alam 

kini suara-suara kedengaran lagi

suara-suara bahagia

gelak tawa dan senyuman jelas tergaris di wajah mereka

menyerahkan aku..

dalam kebosanan..

Bosan. 

kerana hanya aku yang bersungguh-sungguh.

hanya aku yg mengejar

hanya aku yg prihatin

hanya aku yg melakukan segalanya..

apakah semua orang begini sikapnya ?

ego ?

tahukah kalian aku menunggu kalian ?

tahukah kalian malamku sering kali menangis kerana kalian ?

tahukah kalian hati ini sentiasa mengadu sendiri kepada jiwa ?

tahukah kalian bahawa aku tiada sesiapa lg untuk dicurahkan kasihku ?

tahukah kalian aku menyesal mengenali orang2 sperti kalian ?

menyesalkah aku ?

bukankah itu satu takdir ?

Ya.

itu satu takdir. 

tapi mengapa takdir selalu membelakangi aku ?

seolah-olah tidak sedikitpun keinginan utk membahagiakanku ?

wajarkah hamba hina ini meratapi takdirMu ?

ahh . khilafku ! 

khilafku ! 

semuanya khilafku !

sekian . itulah saya pada mlm ini..

MUNTAH ! bwekkkkk egghhuu

gila gila gila. fuh . aku nk muntah sungguh nk muntah gila2 , dekat 3 hari dok bertapa depan laptop mcm orang gila dok buat folio. woi ! bukan 3 hari ! dekat seminggu derr ! Ya Allah . mmg aku benci gila si lembaga mana ntah buat tajuk folio sejarah yang susah tahap gila ! susah tu lain cter, yg lagi menyeksakan, byk la pulak si syarat2 nya , ni kanggg aku dh siap , jgn nk suh aku buat balik ahh dowh ! nk muntah kluar cacing dhni. ohh. punya la sakit kepala buat menatang ni. yg Geog tuu rilek jee pun aku buat. ni masalah trial plk ni. tinggal lg 60 hari . ENAM PULUH HARI ????? bia betik ? betik x betik pun mmg tu la kenyataanya! lps tu masa bila laa aku  nk blaja ni klau x habis2 ngan folio shit ni ? fuh. redha lah. yg penting lepas ni mmg kna struggle ala2 roket soyuz dh ni wei. takut eden . huhh . n yeah . makin hari makin byk masalah aku ! KUSUT !